house of windsor

Old ...written Monday March 9, 2009 by Jeff

William: Daddy had a racecar sippy cup when he was a little boy.

Kate: When Daddy was a little boy, they didn’t have cars.

Jeff: Wait, what?

pause

Kate: When Daddy was a little boy, they didn’t have Disney’s Cars. The movie. Sheesh.

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Cute Things Spoken by Small Children ...written Saturday February 21, 2009 by Jeff

William: “I woke up this morning and I felt bookish; I wanted to read a book. Now I’m DS ish.”

NOTE: That’s DS as in the Nintendo DS. But you knew that, right?

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Messy Theories of Parenting ...written Sunday February 1, 2009 by Jeff

Our term (swiped from a book I read once, somewhere) for our housekeeping style: “cheerfully untidy.”[1] We’re not messy, but we do have seven children and a somewhat higher-than-average tolerance for chaos.

Turns out this just makes us excellent parents. Behold two recent posts from the inimitable Jason Kottke:

Now as soon as I finish writing this self-congratulatory post, I’ve got to get started on a mountain of laundry.

NOTES

¹ I tried to look it up, really. Google’s no help, and neither is Amazon because I haven’t read any of those books. But since at least 22 other people have used the phrase before me, I’ll rest easy and guilt-free.

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Lesson for Today: Washing Diapers ...written Wednesday January 28, 2009 by Jeff

When you accidentally wash a disposable diaper with your darks, you will have to wash the whole load again. Also, you will feel mystified for a while, trying to discern the source of all the lint and translucent granules. And when you finally do figure it out by the nearly-empty shell of a diaper you find at the bottom of the washer, you will feel a strong compulsion to take a shower and forget the source of the lint and translucent granules that are now all over your hair and, you now realize, the basket of clean laundry on the floor.

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WINDSOR'S INDEX, 2008 ...written Thursday December 25, 2008 by Jeff

Chance that a member of the Windsor household sleeps on a bunk bed: 2 in 3¹
Combined age, in years: 129
Change in total combined weight since 2007: undisclosed²
Ratio of males to females: 2:1
Windsors in diapers, as of October: 0³
Miles driven on road trips: 5,000 (approx)[4]
Trips to the emergency room: 0
Trips to the principal’s office: 1
Combined number of schools attended in 2008: 4⁵
Wii or GameCube discs owned: 24
Pairs of eyeglasses lost, broken, or damaged: 4
Non-church-related concerts in which Kate performed: 8⁶
Performances of the all-county audition choir in which Mary performed: 1
Performances of the all-county audition choir in which Jeff and Kate arrived early enough to hear Mary perform: 0
Boy scout campouts attended and rank advancements: 3, 3
Major appliances or vehicles to break during 2008: 5⁷
Major appliances or vehicles that broke during 2008 that are in use by the Windsors in December: 2⁸
Cars sold: 1
Length of the only remaining car, in feet: 18.5
Combined height of family members, in feet: 42.25
Used bicycles purchased: 3
Teeth lost: 7
Overall placement by Jack in cub scout pinewood derby: 1
Months without broadcast television in the home: 4⁹
Approximate temperature of the baptismal water endured by Elizabeth in April: 55¹⁰
Halloween costumes sewn: 4
Facebook friends, combined: 150 (approx)
Books purchased: undisclosed
Yards of fabric purchased: undisclosed
Average number of hippos on Elizabeth’s bed: 2
Cell phones: 2
iPods: 8
Lost iPods: 1
Size, in gigabytes, of the family digital music collection: 35
Frequently used computers: 3
Frequently used manual typewriters: 2
Sonnets read: 350 (approx)
Rounds of “Bananagrams” played: 75 (approx)
Times Henry has counted to 100, so far: 4¹¹
Major rearrangements of the master bedroom: 3
Spelling tests, combined: 83
Times Peter and William have watched Peter Pan since Peter received it as a birthday gift on December 7: 40 (approx)
Boxes full of assorted papers that need to be examined and organized: 28¹²
Loaves of bread baked: 120 (approx)
Hours spent in presidency, BYC, PEC, ward council, or welfare meetings: 230 (approx)
Socks picked up off the floor January through December (emotional estimate): 2.75×10392¹³
Maximum combined minutes spend practicing the piano: 13,200
Minimum combined minutes spent arguing about practicing the piano: 13,201
Responsible adults in the household: 1
Happy thoughts and holiday wishes to our friends and family: infinite¹⁴

Did you want pictures? I had hoped to prepare a sort of “Year End Revue” of photos, but instead I’m going to point you toward the flickr stream of all our photos, and let you choose them yourself.

NOTES

¹ That is to say, only Jeff, Kate, and Peter sleep in non-bunk beds.

² Actually, we didn’t want to try to figure it out. It’s less “undisclosed” and “undetermined”

³ Peter’s not in diapers, but he’s not fully trained, alas.

⁴ Columbus to Boston first, and then Columbus to Utah later. That’s a lot of together time in the car. I’ll tell you what: a TV in the car would have made it worse, not better.

⁵ Fairfield Elementary, Harmon Middle School, Lakeview Junior High, and The Ohio State University

⁶ Kate performed with “The Entertainers” a women’s community choir.

⁷ The Passat, the Suburban, the dishwasher, the clothes washer, the garage door opener

⁸ The Suburban, the clothes washer

⁹ At the beginning of the school year, upon our return from Utah, we cancelled the Dish and have had no broadcast since. It’s been heavenly.

¹⁰ And did she complain? Not a bit.

¹¹ Henry loves school more than any of our children so far.

¹² Predicted number that will be still waiting to be sorted and organized in December 2009: 28

¹³ How many were picked up by the children? Maybe 19?

¹⁴ Really. We mean it.

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